Jess, Day 09: Painting our Life

“We are never given things in life that we can’t handle, always remember that”.

This message came through from a close friend of mine just a few weeks before he decided to end his life. I had never imagined what life would be like without the positive energy, support and love that he radiated everywhere he went. He truly was one of the most selfless, kind and beautiful human beings I had ever met, just like a big brother to me. During the time I was fortunate enough to spend with him, he taught me a lot about life, death and everything in between; lessons I would carry with me through the good and the bad days ahead. I came to learn a lot about myself over the next year, as I continued on my journey to find the light within my soul.

“The sky on a beautiful day just looks like a huge painting to me.

And we are the artists of life.

And we paint the experience we want.

On this beautiful canvas called life”.

Grief is a strange thing, I found it to bring a whole range of emotions, from deep sadness, to an underlying sense of peace and gratitude for the times I had been blessed with and all the memories I could look back on, laugh and often cry about. But more than anything, one thing became very apparent, the open expression of love between everyone as we gathered to remember our dear friend. When we put aside our egos, and take the courageous leap of loving unconditionally, we gently touch the world around us, reminding others of their divinity and intrinsic value here. I think that was his gift, he understood that the important things in life were found in the nameless moments spent laughing and loving.

“Be easy on your soul.

This is all part of your journey.

To show you the power of your light.

And what you can achieve”.

I guess what I have come to understand is that whilst life is riddled with unavoidable challenges, these difficulties do not define us. They simply create us and shape us into the people we become, teaching us more and more about ourselves and showing us that we have a light within us that continues to shine. Taking the time to reflect within and listen to your mind and body, so that you may be in touch with how you feel is so vital. It’s from this awareness that we can begin to understand who we are. Healing is a gradual process, and certainly not linear; we must remain patient and hopeful in the darker times, for with time and love, our souls will find peace again. We are stronger than we believe, and deep down there is an undeniable ability to get through anything life throws at us. 

“Is the zebra black with white stripes or white with black stripes?

It doesn’t matter which way you see it, it’s still both.

You can’t have light without dark.

As much as we avoid the dark.

It’s part of everything”.

I knew when he left this world that his light would keep shining. For I felt the warmth of my beautiful friend in the rays of the sun shining down upon me on a blissful autumn day soon after he passed; a gentle reminder that his love was not gone, and that I would live each day with his light within my soul, loving everyone around me in the same unconditional way that he had. For life is not about what we can achieve or accumulate, but about what we can give to others, and the beauty we can find in all that’s around us.

“It’s just a ride” he said.

I replied “A very beautiful one”.

“As beautiful as we make it”.

“Then ours will be very beautiful. Grateful for knowing”.

“Eternally grateful. Night darling”.

“Night”.

To the reader:

You are divine.

May the stars remind you of your light, for you were created to shine.

Find peace within your soul, on your journey through life; remembering that you are loved beyond what you could ever imagine and appreciated for what you are inside.

Be grateful for everything that you do have, and this blessing of life.

You not only have to see the light, but be the light.

Shine on.